Intention and integrity
and why we have all had enough of Live, Laugh, Love and other doggerel...
NO!
I have had enough of it! It had its time but Live, Laugh, Love can do one! We all do it anyway ! It’s normal - I don’t need a badly painted sign with it daubed on thanks.
If you have got to this point in my Life Edit creative coaching series, then chances are you have already started to experience what it is truly like to write like your life depends on it!
This whole project did actually start out as a programme called Write Your Life and that is exactly what we are doing - writing to ‘right’ our life!
Being intentional is a HUGE part of any kind of creativity, and is pivotal to making changes too.
Using handwriting rather than a keyboard is always more intentional - if only because you really have to think about what you are doing (you are thinking about it even if you don’t realise you are!) rather than let your fingers dance swiftly (ish!) across the keyboard as I am doing now !
This is probably a good time to check in with yourself to make sure your intentions for change also have integrity and that you are ready to make transformations.
That’s a big, loaded word but it doesn't have to be a TOTAL transformation of your life. The idea is to use your daily writing to figure out the detail, the minutiae, the sticking points that are holding you back and attend to them first. The changes or transformations will follow.
The Life Edit isn’t all about making HUGE changes or setting ourselves MASSIVE AMBITIOUS goals. It works best if you aim for smaller, incremental tweaks and adjustments as they will add up to significant changes that are likely to have increased longevity and real impact, adding value to the changes you want to make at a time when you feel comfortable and settled with the plans you are making.
If you are revisiting any part of the process at this point - here are a few things that might help because we ALL modify what we want to change/improve/delete in our lives all the time - The Life Edit should stay with you for life and be something that you call on whenever you feel you need it.
These are my own personal changes and revelations because I am just like you and my life changes and challenges all the time and sometimes it’s good to decide to delete and define what it is you really want. And one thing I won’t be doing is hanging up a sign proclaiming that we should all Live, Laugh and Love…
I set a BIG income goal for this year - TOO big, and also unnecessary if I am honest so I am dialling it back. I had spent too much of my time obsessing about this number and realised that I need to invest energy in better ways.
A few years ago I would have seen this as failure but I have edited my plans based on something far MORE important than money - happiness and wellbeing. I have been able to do this because of the consistent daily writing and life editing that I do. When things come up that no longer serve me - I change them.
Life happens and so does death - my Dad died in April just a few short weeks ago but this has given me a different perspective on many things and what I thought was important really isn’t anymore, so I am pivoting some of my ideas and plans. I can do this because I am unravelling things each day with my writing and journalling.
Integrity and honesty are vital for the Life Edit to work and I fully embrace that! I am saying “no, thank you” to things I don’t want to do and I am taking time each day to do things that will enrich my life and make me happy.
Even at the experienced aged of 58 😂 I feel wounded and upset by things that people say to me and about me. I have aways carried these things with me but no longer! What other people think of me is none of my business and I cannot spend the rest of my life worrying about it. Listing these hurtful and untrue comments is a brilliant way to remove them from your narrative and replace them with all the many wonderful, positive and happy things in your life - there are always more joys than woes, sometimes you just have to look a little harder for them. Write them down and feel the joy!
The Life Edit is ever evolving, and by now you should have embraced your daily writing habit and be well on the way to seeing a very clear pathway to whatever it is you are planning to do next.
This is a good time to look at lists and to start to make sure you are setting intentions to succeed with integrity and a time limit for you to reach your goals.
The word wish often gets a bad press. I am not in the business of giving people false hope and get genuinely irritated by people who say things like “I wish I could win the lottery-then everything would be OK” or ‘I wish I could lose weight then I would be really happy.”
Wishing is not the same as planning with intention and integrity, it is not the same as being proactive and it is not the same as visualising what you want your life to look like. However, creating a list of all the things that you would like your life to look like is exactly all of those things and I guess one way to look at it is as a Wish List.
If you “wish” for change that’s fine to a point, but let’s now take it one step further and use writing to build an intentional list that goes way beyond a pipe dream and is underpinned with integrity-the right reasons for desiring change.
Lists are brilliant-they are deceptively powerful tools that carry a lot of weight and have a huge impact when used properly. You can write lists for just about everything-from simple weekly to do lists to lists of your favourite places, books or movies and lists of things you want to do with your life. Ticking off tasks on a to-do list is one of the most satisfying things you can do and remember you only have to tick one thing off each day to be really winning at life.
They are powerful because they are simple but don’t be deceived by their apparent simplicity because they hold the power to create significant change. So how do lists work?
They are easy to create and quick-very quick. You can dash off a list in no time and there right in front of you, you have a power packed hand-written intention calling you to take action.
The actions will probably be quite short sentences, phrases or even just single words and they are hard to ignore. We have all had that nagging feeling that we have to tick something off our list and the feeling when we DO is beyond satisfaction.
We can drill down using lists to create our very own pros and cons exercise, we can work things out using them, we can use bullet points, colours, illustrations, graphs and diagrams. Lists are your new best friend!
Lists are really hard to ignore because they are made with such commitment, and that’s why I use them all the time and they are an important part of the LIFE EDIT programme.
Start making lists every day-list your goals then break those goals down into mini or micro goals or steps and then make another list of everything you need to do to achieve just one of those steps.
Then each week tick off all the actions you have completed-it will feel great trust me.
In the same way you can start building the list for your life. List all the things you would like to change, things you need to do in order to make those changes and then list all the ways those changes will make your life better.
Once we choose to adopt a positive mindset, even more positive things head our way. Our brain continually works to ‘filter’ the huge quantity of information in the world around us and lets relevant information through based on the parameters we set.
If we act with positive intention and integrity, grace and courage and habitually choose to focus on positive things, especially through our daily writing exercises, that will gradually become the ‘lens’ through which our brain sees the world. Positive affirmations are a great way for us to project positivity and be truly intentional in our actions, thoughts and feelings. If we are serious about changing the way we think and feel, then we need to choose words that reinforce rather than undermine our positive mindset. There is no such thing as an empty statement—all words carry power.
When we constantly think and talk about ourselves in negative terms—when we tell ourselves “I can’t”—then we invite negativity into our lives. But if we can banish negative thoughts, and instead intentionally say “I can”, we shift our mindset and project positive energy.
As part of your writing activity, it’s a good idea to spend some time collecting and curating positive and inspiring words that really back up your ideas with integrity and intention. I don’t mean cheap, throwaway doggerel! We have all had enough of Live Laugh Love I think!
These could be your own words, or quotes that you have heard or read. Write them down in your journal and display them prominently in your home. Write them down every day and keep a list in your journal of words that really inspire and motivate you. If you encounter negative or passive words simply replace them with words that resonate much better with you and your plans. As well as writing them down, say them aloud with conviction and smile!
Refer to them daily as reminders of how far you have come and what you are truly capable of achieving.
When we are working towards our new goals it is important that we surround ourselves with constant reminders and little triggers to help us stay on track and make sure we remain intentional and focused as often as possible. Whatever you are working towards, there are plenty of ways to make sure you are always manifesting ways to get there.
Here are just a few things that you can do to promote intentional positivity and happiness as well as your daily writing activities:
• Set a regular reminder on your phone with your goals
• Change your passwords and ringtones to something happy and positive
• Put a picture of whatever your goal will be in your purse/bag/wallet
• Take home a stone or shell from a walk to remind you of happy days
• Pick some flowers for your room
We are often very bad at putting ourselves first, so here are some ideas for small things we can all do to be intentional in the way we treat ourselves and inject a burst of happiness and positivity into our days:
• Don’t save anything for ‘best’ wear it now and feel great
• Make yourself a fresh cup of tea/coffee with your favourite teapot/coffee pot and lovely mug
• Sit in a lovely café by yourself for a whole afternoon
• Use your best stationery and pens and send out letters to people telling them about your plans.
• Use all those beauty and pampering products that you have been given and are saving for some reason
• Buy something delicious to eat-just for you
• Sit down with a good book and no distractions
These may appear to be very simple actions, and it is entirely possible that you are already doing some of them-which is great! If you are not, then now is the time to intentionally put yourself and your goals first and really start to live your life as if you have achieved your goals.
Without really starting to ‘feel’ your success it will be much harder to manifest it. By using some of these ideas and then writing about how they make you feel, you will see fast progress.
Lots of love
About the author
I am a journalist, writer and TV producer and also the co-founder of this small artisan creative business I live in beautiful Oxfordshire with my husband Colin (AKA Mr A) and I really appreciate you stopping by to read my posts because I know how busy Substack (and life) can be. I am a daughter, sister, mum, step mum, grandma and auntie and write about my work, life, my family and our business.
Once a week (usually on Wednesday or Thursday) I share a personal essay and update on my life and our business, and on Mondays paid subscribers can access articles based on my very successful 1:1 coaching programme The Life Edit.
The Life Edit is an eight step programme that uses writing and creativity to help us find balance and direction while navigating life changes and challenges. Like all of us, I have had MANY challenges and it is always writing and creativity that helps me the most.
You can buy my book about all of this here or contact me here sarah@sarahadams.co.uk to find out more and book a Life Edit session. Paid subscribers will receive a 20% discount on all coaching sessions with a 12 month subscription.